Why I Didn't Attend My H.S. Reunion

My ten year high school reunion was this weekend, but I didn't attend. Here's why:

* Everyone from high school that I WANT to keep in contact with, I do. Either through Facebook or e-mail.

* I knew I'd get the question that I HATE: "What have you been doing the last ten years?" and the answer is not very exciting.

* I spent seven of the last ten in college, I have pretty much nothing to show for the time since high school except a college degree and Alexis and Austin. I haven't gotten married (or had any romantic relationship for that matter) no kids, no paying job, nothing. A LOT has happened in my life since H.S. and I can definitely say I'm NOT the same person, but as I said, nothing to show for any of that.

* None of my dreams I had then have come to pass and none of the dreams I have NOW are coming true yet.

In short, it just wasn't good for my self esteem to attend. Perhaps when we have our 20th reunion.....God only knows.

Big Screen Baby!

Remember in the post below how I said I had a September 1st goal I wanted to reach? Well, as of today, August 11th, that goal has been made!

I bought my flat screen on August 2nd. We got home, plugged everything in and my cable box went kaput leaving me only able to watch DVD's until the cable people could come out yesterday and hook up my new HD cable box (which ALMOST didn't happen, but that's a story I'd rather NOT get into right now). Anyhow, everything is now all hooked up and working GREAT!

My parents took care of the cable bill and installation fees as an early birthday present! I'm now the only one in the house with a flat screen AND HD and let me tell ya...There's a HUGE difference!

Last night Mom came in my room and we watched our usual (America's Got Talent) on my T.V. Mom was VERY impressed and we've decided that we'll be watching Grey's Anatomy and Private Practice in my room when it returns. This will allow Dad (who, while he has nothing but good things to say about Patrick Dempsey, is not a GA or PrP fan) to watch the television in the living room. All other shows though will be kept on the living room DVR since we all like those! And this Fall is going to be a BUSY T.V. season for me it looks like. That schedule coming in a later entry.

A Blast From The Past!

I'm in the process of (hopefully) getting rid of my TV/VCR so that I can buy a flat screen and get DVR hooked up in my room, my goal is to have everything set up by September first so that I can have a few weeks to make sure everything works right before my Fall T.V. shows return the week of September 20th.

In doing this, it means getting rid of ALL of my VCR tapes which I had A LOT of. Now I just have a handful left containing shows I haven't been able to find on DVD yet. A few of those tapes include episodes of my all time favorite T.V. show "Sisters" which aired in the 90's.

I absolutely LOVED this show! It even continues to trump Grey's Anatomy on the favorites scale (I know....SHOCKER!) so the thought of me not being able to watch it anymore was tough to swallow. Luckily, I recently found someone that had my two favorite seasons of the show on DVD and ordered them! Now I'm having a TOTAL BLAST watching my favorite "Sisters" (not to mention my favorite actress Sela Ward that I've mentioned before in previous entries).

I got into the show during the first episode of Season Four. The second episode of that season introduced James Falconer (played by George Clooney before anybody knew who George Clooney was including myself). He became the love interest to Sela Ward's character Teddy and I ADORED them together! My Teddy/Falconer love is exactly even with my Meredith/Derek love. Berfore Mer and Der, NOBODY could touch them! Teddy and Falconer were eventually married but then Falconer was killed off because George had gotten the role as Doug Ross on E.R. The rest is history....
You'd think that I'd stop watching with my favorite couple broken up, but nope I just couldn't stop watching! The same season George was killed off, Daniel Gerroll was introduced as Georgie's (played by Patricia Kalember) therapist. We won't go into all of the reason's poor Georgie was in therapy, only to say that Patricia did a phenomenal job with the difficult subject matter and because of that, won me as a big fan as well. I'll shorten it for you by saying that Georgie (who was married with two teenage sons) eventually began having an affair with her therapist. Now, when I was watching this and even now as I re-watch, I KNEW it was WRONG on SO SO SOOOOO many levels but there was something about those two that as I watched, I just kept thinking "Wow, it may be wrong, but their chemistry is through the roof!!!" It was like a car wreck that you just couldn't take your eyes away from (I might have also been glued to Daniel Gerroll's British accent as well...I have a thing for accents!) It wasn't until a year or so after the show went off the air that I found out that Daniel and Patricia were married (and had been for several years before Daniel's stint on the show!!) No WONDER they had so much chemistry! Now as I re-watch their scenes, the chemistry makes sense (even if the affair was WRONG) and given the subject matter, things were probably easier for Patricia being able to act it out and talk about some of the things she had to talk about, with her husband and not just some random actor. And when I say subject matter, I'm talking about the initial reason Georgie was in therapy, not the affair. Although, I'm sure those scenes were made easier too..LOL!

I'm now watching each disk so that I can label them and re-living all of the great "Sisters" story lines! It's amazing how you can STILL love a show so much even after it's been off the air for close to fifteen years now! Thanks to these dvd's though, I can now visit with the "Sisters" any time I choose!

*Side note* It was announced just weeks ago that Sela Ward is joining the cast of CSI:NY airing Friday's this Fall!

Finally! We have a title!

Today was our first day of Vacation Bible School. I was up before daylight and have only just recently been able to slow down. I was exhausted, trying to make my legs move my body to the shower when I was alerted to some great news...The title for the Season 7 Grey's Anatomy premiere has been announced!

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT WHAT IT IS!!!

I'm awake now! This title lends itself to SO many possibilities and my mind is going wild trying to cover them all! Is it September 23rd yet??

I Wonder.....

There are certain things I know:

God loves me. God doesn't make mistakes, God saw me before I was born and knit me together.

I know all of this things. I say these truths to many people, but ya know, even knowing these I find myself lately saying, "I wonder....." I wonder what my life would be like if I had been born WITHOUT Cerebral Palsy and able to walk.

I wonder if I would be married by now or if I would have kids.

I wonder if I would be in L.A. pursing my dream of working in the entertainment industry. Television is my passion, I love it. I love writing about it, reading about it, analyzing every bit of my favorite show, every character, every song choice. I wonder if I didn't have CP where I would be right now in terms of that and what I would be doing.

I wonder if my dream of meeting and thanking Patrick Dempsey would have happened. Had I been physically able, I would be able to get on a plane by myself, fly to a race that he was at and meet him like everyone else does. My disability complicates that. It's funny, in most every other situation, I stick out like a sore thumb because of my CP, but when it comes to trying to meet Patrick Dempsey, I blend right in and I'm just another fan...Nobody pays attention, nobody cares. When I WANT to stick out, I blend in.

I wonder if my parents ever wonder what life would be like if I didn't have CP, I wonder if they're dreams for me flew out the window when I was born two and a half months early. I wonder if they're disappointed because I'm NOT married, and DON'T have kids, and a decent job. I wonder if they wish things were different.

I wonder if Alexis is ever bothered by the fact that the girls on her softball team stares at me every time I'm at a softball game, I wonder if it bothers her that I'm not the Aunt that can pick her and her brother up and take them to the movies, or out for ice cream.

I wonder once more if I truly AM okay mentally or if I AM "slow" because of my CP. I wonder if I behave differently than others and no one tells me because they just chalk it up to my CP. I've noticed this fear has caused me to become a lot more self conscience and somewhat quieter because I don't want to say or do something stupid and once again, get stared at.

I wonder if my CP is the reason I look fifteen instead of 28 and if that is the reason I've never really had a serious romantic relationship.

And I know, believe me I KNOW that WITHOUT Cerebral Palsy I wouldn't have met some of the people and had some of the experiences that I've had, which is why I said many times that in many was my Cerebral Palsy has been a blessing, but I can't pretend I DON'T think about what life would be like to be physically able.

I wonder.....I wonder so many things. Sometimes it just really STINKS to be disabled, and I hate it! I try to remember the fact that God sees the big picture and on the day that He calls me Home, He will show me why, and I will wonder no more...It will all make PERFECT sense.

Mark It Down!

September 23, 2010: The Grey's Anatomy Season 7 Premiere! Put it on your calendars in BIG LETTERS! Make your plans accordingly!

Who else is excited??

Galveston 2010

Last Monday and Tuesday my family and I went for our annual trip to Galveston and Moody Gardens! We're not really beach people so we enjoyed just hanging out at the water park at Moody Gardens!

It was so much fun to stay in the cool water all day instead of sweating in the heat! And hearing Alexis laugh as she rolled me through the water sprinklers was the highlight of the trip (that's also when my wheelchair got its yearly washing LOL).

Kimberly booked the hotel rooms and they were, without a doubt, the nicest hotel rooms we've ever stayed in....The room was HUGE with two queen sized beds and could have easily fit a third bed, the bathroom was big and even had a shower chair already in the tub waiting (a God thing, because I forgot to bring mine). LOVED our hotel!

We topped the night off with a trip to Rain Forest Cafe which allows you to feel as though you're eating IN the rain forest...Complete with thunder, lightning, rain and animal sound effects throughout the evening...We love eating there and going on the ride afterward! So much fun!

Tuesday, Dad and Justin played golf (in the rain) while Kimberly, Lexi, Austin, Mom, and myself went shopping on the strand...TOTALLY NOT handicapped accessible, but we did manage to find an old fashioned ice cream shop with a lift elevator where the kids got ice cream and Mom found (and bought me) some of my beloved cotton candy Jellybeans! I've already eaten all of them! :(

We managed to leave Galveston long before hurricane Alex made his presence known (aside from some rough waves on Tuesday as some signs that he was indeed out there).

Tazzie had her first "sleep away" from us as we boarded her at the vet for the first time ever. Last year was just too much for her so she stayed with the vet and got updated on her shots and got her physical while she was there. She did great and was very happy to see us Tuesday afternoon!

Our motto for the trip became "Waterlogged" since we all got wet on both days of the trip whether it be from the water park or shopping/golfing in the rain. We had a blast though and made some awesome memories! :)