Thirty Days of Prayer

I was reading a chapter in my latest "Chicken Soup for the Soul" book yesterday when I came across the story who told of her pastor telling his congregation, "If you want to see results in prayer, pray for thirty days without ceasing." I stopped reading as I took that in.

I must admit that when I thought about it, there's really only one thing that I have ever really given concentrated prayer to and that was Kyle Sherrill. His story alone should have been proof enough what can happen if you stay consistent in your prayers about something. I can't think of another instance where I've ever been THAT consistent over something in prayer and it saddens me and embarrasses me at the same time.

That's not to say, I don't pray. When I tell someone I'm praying for them, I mean it and I do it. I lift them up. Along with all of the other things I lift up and I do that for several things and several people daily. It's focusing on ONE THING for an extended period of time that I have trouble with (my "prayer A.D.D." kicks in).

As I read this sentence in my book my thoughts immediately went to my dream of meeting Patrick Dempsey (read my story on the right to find out more). Yes, I pray daily about it, and that the efforts I have made to try and get my story to him will somehow pay off, but I must admit to slacking off because I've grown frustrated by the lack of progress. I pray about it, I lift it up, but I can't say I've really given it any concentrated prayer effort in awhile. And I thought, "I wonder what would happen if I devoted some time in my day to specifically pray for that particular thing to come to pass!"

So, starting Monday, March 16th, I am committing myself to praying in a concentrated effort for thirty days, that progress WILL be made in my desire to meet and thank Patrick Dempsey personally. I am praying that God will line things up, that he will put the right people in my path, and that HE will make this happen. Somehow, some way.

It's a big dream that will only happen because God makes it happen and anything is possible, if we believe.

I would be very appreciative if you would join me in praying about this for thirty days with me. I believe that one person's prayers are heard, but how much more awesome would it be to know I had friends joining me for thirty days in prayer believing for this to happen.

I'm going to need encouragement, I'm going to need accountability, I'm going to need people that will believe for me when I get frustrated. I'm going to need your help!

Will you join me in this effort to pray for this dream of mine to come true? Please leave a comment if you'll be praying with me.

Thirty days. I can't wait to see what God is going to do!

Double Dose of Doctors....

*Smiles at title of post*

Okay, I'm very conflicted...Derek Shepherd has left me very conflicted and NOT in a good way! I kind of really disliked him at the end of tonight's show...I get that he lost Jen and he's upset about that (heck, *I'M upset about that...I really liked Jen), and then he found out that he's killed more patients then saved patients. I get that he's depressed, and that he was drunk...REALLY drunk when he went off on his tirade on Meredith, I get that he was upset when he took the baseball bat and whacked the engagement ring across the lawn, I get that NONE of what he had to say, and NONE of what he did had anything to do with Meredith, I get his feelings, because I've been there...But still, I hated it. It was painful to watch and painful to hear. I know he'll come out of it and he'll have some MAJOR making up to do to make up for all of the stuff he spewed at Meredith tonight, but again...I hated it.

Want to know what I loved? I loved that Meredith gets it. I loved that she gets it because SHE'S been there. I loved that Meredith found out about the impending proposal and ring and didn't run away. I loved that she didn't freak out. I loved that she went straight to Derek. I loved that she got that he was drunk and the words held no truth because they were from alcohol and nothing more. I loved that she stood there and took every horrible thing that Derek said and still stood firm, refusing to give up on him...On them. I LOVE how she's grown!!! Oh my gosh...I'm SO flippin' proud of her! She may freak out the next day, or even in the next hour, but in that moment, she stood solid. Being there for him the same way he's been there for her. I'm SO proud.

On to another show that left me with no conflicts whatsoever tonight....

GEORGE CLOONEY BACK AS DOCTOR ROSS ON E.R. TONIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh my flippin' goodness how happy I am!!!!!!!! And Carrol was with him....AND he had on a wedding ring!!!!!! I'm CONVINCED his hand was placed like that to make sure the gold band was visible!!! They're STILL SO GREAT together!! The cute banter and talk about the twins and the spelling test they had that day. Then the cuddling at the very end of the episode as they said "I love you" to each other. And I, in turn, said, "I love you too!!!" *sigh* THANK YOU George and Julianna for coming back! Still crossing my fingers that we'll see you again for the two hour series finale on April 2nd.

And NOW you probably have a better understanding of the title of this entry... :)

The Shirt Says it All

Update on Baby Kyle!

Thanks to all who have been praying for Kyle Sherrill today! His Mom Kelly posted an update just a short time ago. To read the latest, CLICK HERE.

Please continue to pray for Kyle as he recovers and for his family as they care for him!

God is SO good and I am SO thankful for all that He has done for and through sweet Kyle! What an incredible God we serve!

Thanks again for praying and for continuing to pray!

A Little Bit of Everything

Well, in order to comment on everything I want to comment on which really has no particular order, and to save me from pulling my hair out trying to PUT everything in order, I'm just going to do bullet points today, and hope nobody minds.

* First off, thank you for all of the feedback I got When I posted this. Just when I start to think I'm talking to myself here, you guys show up and share your stories with me and love and support me. Thanks to all of you that continue reading and let me know what you think. I've got some pretty awesome friends!

* Thanks also for the person that sent me the text several nights ago at two in the morning with the message: "I just heard about Patrick Dempsey leaving Grey's. Are you okay?" I think Kara and myself are probably the only people on Earth who get texts and phone calls whenever Patrick Dempsey is involved in something and we normally are the ones calling EACH OTHER so I got a real kick out of the text. My answer: Yes, I'm great. Why? Patrick isn't leaving the show...His CHARACTER Derek is quitting his job at Seattle Grace Hospital which caused rumors to run wild that Patrick was exiting the show, but no...Derek will be going through a bit of a depression when the show FINALLY returns March 12th which is allowing PD to grow some major scruff (much to Kara's delight) but PATRICK is staying put. And if you need more reassurance, here it is straight from Patrick Dempsey himself. Thanks for the concern over my reaction to it though...I feel loved!

* Anybody see the two hour episode of Brothers & Sisters last Sunday? Oh my gosh...Rob Lowe's heart attack scene has got to be one of the most realistic looking heart attacks I've ever seen on television....I smell an Emmy nom for that....Kudos to him and the make up department for the "look" they gave him for that scene. "Fix You" is now one of my favorite songs...That montage was wonderfully done! I just love that show! And I love Rob Lowe too...Have ever since The West Wing!

* Did a few tweaks to the blog. Nothing major...You'd have to really look around to find most of them, but it took awhile nonetheless. I'm happy with the end result though and really it's not so much for the regular blog visitors (Subscribers won't see any of it. You'd have to actually see the blog to notice any change) as it is for those that are first timers and don't know anything about me or this blog. I made the changes with them in mind, but who knows who else might gain something from it as well.

* Please remember to pray for Kyle Sherrill. He was supposed to have surgery today (March 4th) and there have been no updates to the blog so he's probably home by now recovering. Please keep praying for him as he recovers.

* I finally was able to buy the book entitled, "The Shack." Been wanting it for quite some time...I've heard awesome things about it (and Michael W. Smith is the first person to offer praise about it on the back cover so...there ya go!) Can't wait to get into it!

* Lexi is all signed up for softball....Opening Day is the 21st of this month. She's thrilled! We're all very excited and can't wait to cheer her on. Please keep her and her team in your prayers for safety as they practice and get ready.

* Austin is all about golf these days and of course, Hally Babe (Alexis' horse) those two things are all he talks about....And my dad loves it!

* I'm still volunteering at the church on Friday's (although I am taking this week off to go to Fairfield to watch my cousin play ball). It's not often he plays this close to us so we're all going to cheer him on Friday afternoon! Looking forward to that!

I'm sure I left SOMETHING out but those are my ramblings for now. :)

Pray For Kyle! Surgery on March 4th!

Many of you who read this have heard me talk about and request prayer Kyle Sherrill. I post today asking for more prayer on his behalf.

According to this post that his mom, Kelly posted today, Kyle is scheduled to have his hernia repaired on March 4th. I ask anyone and everyone who reads this to start praying now. Pray for Kyle, pray for his parents Kelly and John, pray for the doctors and nurses that will be taking care of him. Just lift the situation up daily.

Kyle's story is a miracle story and it gives clear evidence that prayer works. So, I ask you to please pray and have others pray as well for this precious family. Thank you!!

Lessons Learned From Dark Moments

"I've got a story, I've got a story to tell, and I wish it was a pretty one." ~Michael Kisur~

I get told many times how wonderful my attitude is about my disability and how I handle it. And often, those remarks cause me to inwardly cringe. Why? Because I know the truth. I know the times I have wondered why and wished it could be different. I know the times my attitude, while on the outside portrayed that everything was fine, while inside, I was hurting and confused. I know the nights alone in my room where I had thoughts of just wanting it all to stop, for everything to just be over and done. I know. I know how bad it got. I know. And it was anything BUT good. And with that brings guilt...A LOT of guilt.

I'm learning that one of the hardest things a person can do is forgive. Not someone else...Yes, while that may be hard, often times the person hardest to forgive is our self. Because we know that many times the person we see in the mirror is not the person we are and we have to find a way to manage that.

The thing is...I have to remember, that I've already been forgiven. Everything I've done, everything I've considered doing, everything I will do has been forgiven. Is it for me to say that Jesus dying for me...For EVERYTHING I've done was not enough? No. It's a struggle every day though. It's a choice every day for me to look at myself and say "You're forgiven."

Another thing I'm learning....It's in those darkest moments that God will get the most glory.....If we allow it. See, I know that since my darkest moment in 2006, that God is working on me BECAUSE of that time. I have a story that someone out there needs to hear...I don't know who, or when, or why...But someone somewhere is in the place where I was...And I can give them hope. I can share with them what God did for me...How He showed up in a very unlikely way and how in that moment, everything changed. I can BE that for another person. But if I'm constantly walking around hanging on to the guilt of how I almost blew it, then I'm wasting time. And I'm more than likely missing chances to help other people. God wants to give my pain a purpose.

I'm not saying that God wanted me in a depressed state...That wasn't His doing. That was all Satan. There were two voices I could have listened to during that time and instead of listening to His still small voice, I listened to the one that screamed at me endlessly. The one that told me I wasn't good enough, smart enough, the one that told me I was damaged and slow, the voice that told me I was alone and that nobody knew how I felt, that nobody had been where I was. It was that voice that made praying difficult...So difficult in fact that I stopped praying and started begging...For anything to prove him wrong. For anything to make everything okay again....And God showed up. Revealing Himself through Patrick Dempsey in a youtube video on a late September night in 2006....God showed up as I listened to Patrick Dempsey's story and heard my own. God showed up.

No, God did not want me in that depressed state, but He took my darkest moment and gave it purpose. He showed me that one person, one voice, one action, one story can make a difference. And after that night....I'm changed. I'm changed because I know God can use me. I can be that one person for someone else. My outlook is different, my purpose is different, my perspective is different.

I wake up every morning and before I even leave my bedroom, I look at myself in the mirror and say to myself. "You're forgiven." Forgiveness, like everything else doesn't happen overnight, it's a process, but for me, saying that is a start and a reminder to not let guilt that has already been taken care of by my Creator, hold me back from what God is doing and wants to do through me.

I'm working on saving up for a bracelet I want that I want to have inscribed with "The Dempsey Difference" so that I can have a constant reminder on my wrist at all times of that moment and what I've learned because of it.

I don't share this easily, and I can imagine many of you probably have a very different picture of me now and that's understandable. I write this though with one favor to ask:

If you're carrying guilt today...Let it go. God has something He wants to do through YOU and He can't use you to the fullest extent if you won't allow Him to. Let it go. You're forgiven.

"Would it set me free if I dared to let you see the truth behind the person that you imagine me to be." ~Casting Crowns~