My Story and The Dempsey Difference

I had given up. I was convinced that I was alone and I no longer wanted to go on. Then one person unknowingly changed everything. My name is Natalie, and this is my story……

I was born on August 15, 1981....I wasn't supposed to arrive until October 31. Being born two and a half months early, I weighed less than two pounds at birth and was flown almost immediately from Huntsville to Texas Children's Hospital in Houston. That was where I spent my life up until the day of my original due date. I wasn't supposed to survive, thank God I already had a stubborn will and thank God He had plans!

Because of my being born two and a half months early, I have Cerebral Palsy which causes me to have to use a walker to get from place to place. I'm very blessed because my form of CP only affects my legs and has no effect on me mentally.

However, when I was three, I started pre-kindergarten and was placed in a class where all of the students but myself and one other person (who was deaf) were PROFOUNDLY mentally challenged. I know many would find it hard to believe, but I knew even then that I didn't belong there but I didn't realize how much it would affect me until later.

My college years were by far the hardest years of my life. It was so difficult and I didn't understand why. I'd never been an all A student, but I was a decent student. College was a whole new ball game and when I talked to friends to see if they were struggling like I was, they seemed to be doing fine. It was at this point when I really started wondering if I actually WAS mentally impaired in some way because of my CP. I wondered if perhaps my parents knew something I didn't and THAT'S why I had been placed in that class all those years ago. I wondered if they had never told me because they didn't want to hold me back or label me as something. Memories from my time in that class flooded back and I began to seriously question SO much about myself.

I never told my parents or other family because I didn't want them to feel guilty for choices they had made but I felt utterly alone and in desperate need of some reassurance that I was okay--in every way. I went to bed at night praying...Begging... for hope...for something to hold on to, for SOMETHING to show me that I wasn't alone and that everything would be okay. I contemplated suicide. It was, qithout question, the darkest time in my life.

One night in September of 2006, I was surfing youtube looking at different Meredith and Derek videos (I was just getting into Grey's Anatomy at that time and had already grown really fond of Meredith and Derek, but had NO IDEA who Patrick Dempsey was). As I surfed, I came across an interview he had done with Barbara Walters. I thought it might be interesting so I clicked and started watching.

A few minutes into the interview, Barbara asked Patrick about his battle with Dyslexia. It was then that he revealed that at a young age HE had been placed in a class with severely mentally challenged kids, because they hadn't diagnosed his dyslexia yet. Tears filled my eyes as I listened and as I did, it felt like I could breathe for the first time in a VERY long time. It was at that moment...I knew...Patrick was the answer to the prayers I had spent months praying for...He was the one that showed me through HIS story that *I* was okay, because HE had been where I was and HE was okay. I looked at Patrick and saw myself. I heard Patrick's story and heard my own. He pulled me back from the edge. I really don't know if I would be here today if it were not for him. He saved my life.

I didn't get online that night looking to be saved. In fact, I was looking for an escape from the dark thoughts going through my head. I wasn't looking for Patrick Dempsey to save me, I didn't even know who Patrick Dempsey WAS, but God works in mysterious ways and He worked through Patrick Dempsey that night.

Since that night, I'm a different person. I KNOW the power one person can have, and because of that, I live differently because I never know when *I* might be that voice of hope that someone needs. Beacause of Patrick, I know that one person, one voice, one action, one story can make a difference.....It can change EVERYTHING!
It is my deepest dream and I pray daily that the day will come when I can meet Patrick Dempsey in person. To be able to look him in the eye, and thank him face to face for what he has done for me. Being able to thank him in person would mean more to me than I could ever express. I pray for that day, I beg for that day, and I have to believe that one day...My dream will come true.

To read more blogs about my "Dempsey Dream" CLICK HERE.